An Evening with Special-K

In yesterday's blog I mentioned my reputation at my place of business since my night with Special K back in November. Special K was from our parent corporation's headquarters who was assigned to our company in order help out with an excess of work around that time. I was still relatively new to the company and didn't work with Special K at all. Finally when it was time for Special K to leave and go back to the mothership our department head decided we needed to have a nice dinner out to be rewarded for all of the hard work we had done. We left work at about 3:30 that day and headed straight for the bar. Fortunately Killuh P came with us, so I had someone to hang with that was (closer) to my age. Killuh P is our receptionist and isn't quite 21 yet, so we all have to take care of her when we go out in a group. We decided to play darts while the old folks sat and chatted (I say "old" when they're all in their 30's and 40's). I had three or four black and tans and we decided to head over to the restaurant.

At the restaurant everyone had an awesome time. I had a big steak and a few more black and tans. I had my side of the table in stitches making jokes about everything I could think of. It was awesome. The best part of this was that Killuh P was getting pretty hammered at this point. I knew that she had a new boyfriend that none of the other ladies we work with were too fond of, so I start in on her about him (at this point he was supposed to be at the Christmas party and I think we were all interested in seeing him ruin P's evening by making an ass of himself there). Background: apparently the first time Killuh P intriduced this guy to everyone from work he said a few things that no one appreciated. He was completely sober that night. Can you imagine this guy drunk with the same people. The possibilities would have been endless. Anyway, she starts defending him to me in her drunken state. There was no way she could have made this guy sound any better, and at one point she pulls out her phone and starts showing the picture of the two of them around the table. I see the guy. He looks exactly like K-Fed. I sit there dumbfounded until someone asks me why I'm so quiet all of a suffen. My response was something along the lines of "I'm shocked Britney lets this guy off his leash to hang out with Killuh P." Bang bang!

When dinner had been wrapped up we get the "I don't know about you guys but I'm still thirsty" from our department head. This means we're going to a bar. Originally I thought that the evening would end here and thought I''d meet up with Jake and the guys at Fado's. Hearing that I would instead be drinking for free makes me happy. We go up to a bar in Alpharetta and it's kind of dead. I only say kind of dead because there's a group in the corner partying pretty hard. Not everyone gets to make the trip though. Apparently Killuh P had talked to her mom during the dinner service, her mom confronted her at the front door of the restaurant, and her mom drove her home. That was pretty awesome. So those of us who made it are at the bar having a few drinks. Special K is with us, and out of nowhere one of the girls at the table next to us sits on his lap and starts talking to him. Then they start making out. Then her top came off. Then Special K dove headfirst into her exposed cleavage. Then she simply tied her top back up and walked back to her table.

She came back a few times, and stopped to chat with our entire table. The really odd thing was that she gave me her card. I didn;'t think that a real person acted like this and sure as hell didn't think prostitutes kept a legit source fo income. And let's get something straight. I don't throw the word "prostitute" around lightly... unless I'm drunk. The differenece is that the sober people around me were calling her a whore. She was all over Special K for a while until one of the guys at her table told her he had paid for her tie and that she needed to come back (at least that's what I remember). So our department head leaves after getting us pretty sloshed and all of the other people are talking about going hime, so what do I do? "Hey! Let's all go down to Buckhead and go to Fado!"Everyone just kind of stares at me like I'm retarded except for Special K who straight up says "Hell yeah, let's go!"

So we start driving to Buckhead when Special K says "Dude, give me your phone." Okay. "Who should I call?" He ended up calling Leah and tried to tell erh that he received her number at a bar or something. She wasn't having any of it and as he hangs up he says "Yeah, sorry about that, I thought it'd be fiunnier." We get into Buckhead and I definitely make the wrong turn into Midtown. We were completely lost. So while we're lost driving around Atlanta Special K starts talking about the breasts he just devoured in the bar and we were talking about how nice they were (and they were pretty fantastic). So as we're talking, Special K asks "Hey, is there a strip club in this town?" For those who don't knwo I think Atlanta's three greatest natural resources are 1) droppable beats 2) college sports information and 3) lapdances. Not necessarily in that order.

So I know jsut the place, (h)Oasis! We ge to the club, and immediately Special K says "This is awesome, but I have a rule. I can't buy myself lapdances, and you're not buying your lapdances. We pay for each other's lapdances." I was pretty drunk still, so this made perfect sense. We'e getting lapdances and ordering drinks and having a great time, when mid-lapdance Special K lans over and says to me, "Dude, this chick is going to take us up to the VIP. Grab some girl you like."

"Special K, do you have enough cash for that because I don't."

"Fuck it, I've got the corporate card! Don't worry, I can find another job!"

At this point I sobered up pretty quickly. I wasn't in any position to value my job as lightly as Special K, so I suggest we just keep that girl dancing down in teh peasant area for a while longer. After a few hours of lapdances from the same girl, Special K starts ordering shots like a madman. After one shot, I'm immediately doing another. The same girl has taken to Special K and is just hanging out at our table. At this point we need a gameplan for the rest of the night. I decie it'd be best for me (because I'm driving) if we sober up at Waffle House afterwards. Special K then tells the girl that she should meet us at the Waffle House afterwards, only he tris to use the Waffle House like some sort of pick-up line: "So tell me about these Waffle House places I see everywhere, they must be good, right?" Awesome.

The lights come on in the club meaning that we have to go, so we go over to the Waffle House, order breakfast and talk about the wild evening. We make a wager on whether or not the girl is going to show. I bet she would, and Kirby didn't think o. Little did he know why it's called the (h)Oasis. The girl shows up as we're about halfway through our meal. She sits down on the other side of Special K and those two start talking so I think, "Why be the cockblock for this guy and tell Special K "I'm not feeling well" and take off. I get back into the house while the sun is coming up and sleep for a few hours.

When I got into work on Monday, I was a little nervous about people talking about my behavior Friday night. Everyone was pretty cool until someone from another department walks up to my cube and says loud enough for everyone around to hear, "I hear you party like a rockstar!"Apparently Special K didn't get to leave withteh girl as she wouldn't "drive a stranger around" Special K ended up having to take a cab back from the club to his hotel and walked through the lobby still drunk at 8:30am while his fellow hotel stayers were enjoying the continetal breakfast.